1. Liverpool
2. Arsenal
3. Man City
4. Chelsea
5. Aston Villa
6. Tottenham
7. Newcastle
8. Brighton
9. Man United
10. Everton
11. Nottingham Forrest
12. Crystal Palace
13. Fulham
14. West Ham
15. Bournemouth
16. Leeds
17. Brentford
18. Wolves
19. Burnley
20. Sunderland
This prediction was made before the start of the 2025/26 season and with two rounds of matches, I am already looking as clueless as Ruben Amorim tinkering with his tactics board while League Two Grimsby Town knocked his hapless Manchester United team out of the League Cup.
For context, I had an accuracy rate of 15% (3 out of 20) predicting my final table for season 2024/25 (no, I didn’t have Liverpool as champions, the shame), which, frankly, is comparable to Amorim’s 24%-win rate in the Premier League.
Hey Glazers, looking for a new manager?
But I digress. Here are some early observations of the fledgling Premier League season:
Can Arne Slot’s side be the first Liverpool team since 1984 to successfully defend the title?
Seven goals scored, two wins out of two. All is rosy in our quest to retain the league title, or is it?
After conceding 32 goals in 34 games, before shipping nine in the final four games after the title has been won, letting two-goal leads slip in our two games so far has been galling.
With the huge influx of new players coming into the team, it is bound to take time for the likes of Milos Kerkez and Jeremie Frimpong to get used to the Liverpool system. While Frimpong is currently injured after a promising start against Crystal Palace in the Community Shield, Kerkez has begun his Liverpool career in stuttering fashion and was particularly poor against Newcastle, not least in allowing Bruno Guimaraes a free header to kickstart Newcastle’s comeback. (It is not a WWE ring, Milos. Just head the bloody ball away instead of trying to outmuscle your man)
It has not helped that for one reason or another, Ryan Gravenberch and Alexis McAllister have not played together this season. Without the pair, Wirtz has been marooned – it is almost as if someone left him staring at Amorim’s tactics board, trying to figure out where to go. Beyond that, the rest of Slot’s rotations have only underlined one truth: this is still a midfield searching for balance.
The big worry for me so far, however, has been Ibrahima Konate’s abysmal early-season form.
For all the progress made last season in establishing himself as Liverpool’s defensive lynchpin alongside the imperious Virgil van Dijk, the Frenchman has looked like a comical amalgamation of Phil Babb and Harry Maguire: Clumsy, lumbering, and conspicuous by a complete lack of positional awareness. At times, you half expect him to defend with a blindfold on just to see if it makes any difference.
Even with these teething problems, I am still staking my chips on Liverpool’s 21st league title, because nothing would be more poetic than knocking Alex Ferguson’s perch gag into history for good.
By the time the transfer window slams shut on September 1, Liverpool’s ranks could be further bolstered by the additions of Marc Guehi and a certain Alexander Isak. There is also the inevitability of Florian Wirtz growing into his role as the creative fulcrum of the side, although work remains for Arne Slot to find the correct balance to unleash an elite talent.
Arsenal remains the side most likely to run the Reds closest, a summer splurge of their own headlined by the addition of Victor Gyokeres. Whether the Swede is the answer to Arsenal’s supposedly goalscoring woes will go a long way to determining if the Gunners will finally shed their tag of bridesmaid, as well as Bukayo Saka’s increasingly fragile hamstrings, which shiver in fright every time Mikel Arteta signs in exasperation.
The rest of the division represents slim pickings when it comes to potential title challengers. Manchester City will undoubtedly go on a long unbeaten run at some point of the season, but the continued absence of a prime Rodri marshalling City’s midfield may once again leave Pep Guardiola playing catchup to Liverpool and Arsenal in the latter half of the season.
Chelsea? Between Enzo Maresca trying to remember the names of his new players and Todd Boehly spending another 500 million pounds in the January transfer window to buy an entirely new team, the Blues will finish comfortably in fourth place, without really troubling the leading pack.
What about Tottenham, the only one of three teams left with a 100% record in the division? Let us not kid ourselves, it is Tottenham.
Who will do a “Nottingham Forest” this season?
To highlight my complete ineptitude, I had Forest scrapping relegation by the skin of their teeth last season, with a 17th place finish. Instead, Forest finished a scarcely believable 7th and will compete in this season’s Europa League.
So, can Forest duplicate last season’s success? While a raft of impressive late-window signings has raised optimism around the City Ground, Forest’s “promotion” to the Europa League due to frankly uncomprehensible co-ownership rules, may leave them struggling to scale last season’s heights.
(Crystal Palace rejoice: You have a better chance of winning the Europa Conference League anyway. Just ask Chelsea, who won that tournament last season with a predominantly second team, who staggered about the pitch in shock of getting game time, yet won comfortably against the likes of the mighty FC Noah)
Looking at my prediction table, it would appear that Tottenham is the answer, having risen from 17th to 6th, the biggest predicted jump of any team. While Tottenham will not be anyway near the title race, let us not gloss over Tottenham’s abysmal season last time out with that improbable triumph in the Europa League. With the squad at Thomas Frank’s disposal, even with Champions League football, 6th should be a more than reasonable expectation for Spurs to finish in.
Over at the Amex Stadium, the attractive football on display makes Brighton a sentimental favourite, yet there is a sneaking feeling that the inexperience and sometimes technical naivety of the league’s youngest ever manager (which means Fabian Hurzeler will soon be on the radar of Manchester United, as they look to destroy the burgeoning career of another young manager) means that while Brighton will continue to impress in spurts, they may finish a distant 8th behind the chasing pack.
Everton then, is my vote for the surprise package of the season. The wily old fox, David Moyes, is back to build on a hugely encouraging second half of last season, aided by a raft of clever midfield signings. Jack Grealish, in particular, looks like a transformational signing that could finally propel Everton into the higher echelon of the Premier League. 10th surely, is the very bare minimum for the Toffees this season.
Another secret weapon up Moyes’ sleeves could be the splendidly named Hill Dickinson stadium, where you suspect Everton will win more than lose. That is more than can be said of Old Trafford, which lately sounds more like the Hill Dic-isn’t stadium.
Just how low can Manchester United sink this season?
Speaking of Manchester United; even for a Liverpool supporter, it is starting to get embarrassing.
Last season saw the Old Trafford side finished 15th with 42 points – their lowest league position for 35 years and the fewest points in a top-flight season since they were last relegated from the top flight in 1973-74.
Cue anther spending spree close to 200 million pounds to secure three forwards – Matheus Cunha, Bryan Mbeumo, and Benjamin Sesko. Three games into the season, the holy trinity has scored the grand total of one goal (Mbeumo in the dismal draw against Grimsby Town in the League Cup), and Manchester United continue to look like they would struggle to win the S-League if invited to compete in Singapore.
The image of Amorim fiddling with his tactics board while his team looked distinctly mediocre against a League Two club is damning. While he continues to stare at his tactics board like it’s a Rubik’s cube he refuses to solve, his players wander the pitch in existential confusion. Old Trafford now feels less like a stadium and more like an expensive simulator for hapless managers.
With no European football of any kind this season, the expectation is for Manchester United to push for Champions League qualification next season. Instead, United fans are staring down the barrel of the gun with the prospect of their 7th permanent manager in 12 years since Alex Ferguson retired.
Amorim looks like a man who does not want to be where he is, surrounded by players he does not trust and who do not trust him. A parting of the ways seems inevitable.
And so, I offer my unreserved apologies – again – to United supporters. Last season I predicted 7th; they finished 15th. This season, they might just scrap 9th, or something even more tragically symbolic. Come this weekend, if they do not beat Burnley at Old Trafford, I expect to have them in a full-blown relegation dogfight.
And so, begins another Premier League season, where Liverpool defend their crown, United defend their confusion, and the rest of us defend our sanity.